A Gift Fit for a King

“Glory comes to Him when we depend on Him rather than try to enrich Him. If we come to Him with gifts—as though He needed something—then we put Him in the position of a needy person, and we're the benefactors. He always wants to be the one who is infinitely self-sufficient. Therefore, the only gifts that we can bring Jesus are gifts of praise, thanks, longing, and neediness.”

–John Piper

Christmas time means Christmas music—which means I’m allowed to listen to one of my favorite songs in the world on repeat: The Little Drummer Boy.

No, I’m not a drummer, but I’ve always felt what this song describes…that volleyball was my way of honoring God. For as long as I’ve been playing volleyball, I’ve treated it as a gift that I could give to God. Honestly, I never really felt like I had anything else even worthy of giving to Him.

This is one of the reasons why not being able to play volleyball has been difficult to come to terms with. It not only feels like I’ve lost a huge part of who I am, but also that I’ve lost all I had to give to God.

But this song makes me realize those feelings and thoughts are entirely misplaced.

The truth is that nothing I have, or say, or do, not even playing volleyball, is really a fit gift for a King. The Little Drummer Boy in the song knew this. But yet, he gave his best. He did all he could. He offered the only gift he could think of giving, but it was his heart and the fact that he wanted to praise and thank God in whatever way he could—that was his true gift for the King.

Now I’m in the midst of trying to figure out my future, my career, and a lot of other big decisions. I keep thinking that I want to choose the option that is most honoring to God. Which in the end, makes it even harder to decide because I don’t want to make the wrong move.

But all along I’ve been missing the point.

It really doesn’t matter what I choose or what I do, what matters is where my heart is.

I could’ve been the worst volleyball player in the world, but if my heart was in the right place, it would’ve honored God.

Remembering this makes these decisions I have to make a little bit easier. Maybe there isn’t a wrong decision if I’m doing it with the best intentions to serve God.

The truth is I’m writing this blog more for myself… to remind myself that volleyball was never really a gift to God. Sure, it was a talent He gave me, but He didn’t ever want that talent back—He wanted my heart. Volleyball was just a way to show God where my heart was at.

I’m still constantly having to remind myself that my worth to God was never about what I could give. Honestly, it’s hard when the way of the world seems so much different…It is always about what we give, what we have, our success, our talents, etc.

But I think Christmas is a time to remember that God sent Jesus into the world, knowing we could never repay Him…knowing that we’re broken and flawed…knowing that no matter how hard people try sometimes, we will never be good enough.

God sent Jesus to this earth knowing that He would eventually be crucified without any cause. That’s what gives us worth. We’re made worthy by the grace of God, through the sacrifice of Christ.

I pray this Christmas that you would feel worthy…not because of anything you do or say. Not because of your job, or your sport. Not because of your money or success. But because a baby boy was born, lived a holy life, and died on a cross so that you could live.

“And you were dead in the trespasses and sins in which you once walked, following the course of this world, following the prince of the power of the air, the spirit that is now at work in the sons of disobedience—among whom we all once lived in the passions of our flesh, carrying out the desires of the body and the mind, and were by nature children of wrath, like the rest of mankind.

 But God, being rich in mercy, because of the great love with which he loved us, even when we were dead in our trespasses, made us alive together with Christ—by grace you have been saved— and raised us up with him and seated us with him in the heavenly places in Christ Jesus, so that in the coming ages he might show the immeasurable riches of his grace in kindness toward us in Christ Jesus.

 For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God.” –Ephesians 2:1-8